“Do you not care?” Lk 10.40
Hospitality is a
human virtue. Martha excelled in it. She welcomes Jesus to her house and prepares a meal. Mary
sits at the feet of Jesus and listens to him. Martha and Mary combined together
offers the best welcome to Jesus.
While Christ is
speaking Mary is not sleeping. Women know the art of communication through
silence, facial expression, and occasional glance. Where there is love, there is no need for too
many words. Mary is a woman of few words, easily attached to people, and
capable of building deep relationships.
Instead, Martha
is busy and distracted. Though Jesus has no formal degree in Psychology, he is
an expert in analyzing human behavior and very sensitive to people. From the
noise of pots and pans in the kitchen, Jesus knows that Martha is distracted
and he can guess correctly the reason for her distraction. Jesus too is
distracted, not so much with Mary but more with Martha. He knows she is upset
and annoyed.
Martha is quite
the opposite character of Mary. If she has something to say she says it there
and then, no matter to whom she is speaking. She does not carry it ‘in her
heart’ and burden herself with it. She waited for Mary to come and help her.
When she could no longer tolerate it, she comes to Jesus and gives vent to her
complaint, “Lord don’t you care?” Martha is direct. There is no holding back.
Such words would never go to a first-time guest. Martha is familiar with Christ
therefore she takes the freedom to give expression to her feelings.
For many of us, the
normal behaviour is to suppress these feelings for the moment and blurt them
out a week or two later when we have a confrontation with our sister or brother. Martha is a woman of the moment. Martha took
the question to the person concerned and avoided a future confrontation with
her sister.
Martha's question, “Don’t
you care?”, is a question for an answer. So many of us in similar situation
rather than ask a question, make a definitive statement and say, ‘You don’t
care!’. One is a question for an answer, the other is a definitive verdict with
no place for doubt. Martha teaches us that what should be put as a question
should never be put as a condemnation.
“Don’t you
care?”. The question is put not only to Christ but also to Mary. It is a
question we often put to those who seem to be not productive and progressive like
us, those who are not doing, not busy like us. They seem to us as wasting their
time, sitting and day-dreaming. ‘Non-workaholics’ seem to us as non-productive
members of the society. We want everyone to be busy like us, doing many things,
building bigger barns, and getting measurable visible results. The busy ones look down on the silent ones
and wonder why can’t they be like them! “Tell her to help me.”
But Christ is
not going to ask Mary to join Martha. The volume of work, the grade we get, the
size of the buildings we built, and the number of converts we make, is not the
criteria for who is doing better.
If Martha could only pause and look into the eyes of Jesus after her question! It is for Martha that he came to Bethany. It is for Martha that he waited so long. It is for Martha that he is on his way to Jerusalem. He knew every one of her movements in the kitchen. He knows her hurt feelings and why she is feeling that way. All those who feel burdened, victimized or overworked like Martha take your complaints to the right source and pause for a reply from him.
“My sister has
left me to do everything.” Cooking was not a burden for Martha. Her
burden was her sister having a good time. If she had not been around, her work
would have been so light and pleasant. Things have not changed since the time
of Martha. Our problems are not so much the volume of work, but rather our
brothers and sisters having an easy time!
“Martha, Martha
you are worried and distracted about many things, there is need of only one thing.”
Jesus was waiting all this while for Martha to tell her how unfounded her
suspicions are. Jesus knows the art of correcting people. He
does not do it anonymously, cynically, or indirectly. He too, like Martha, is
direct and particular. Calling the person twice by name suggests familiarity,
love, and concern. What is to be told to Martha, he tells to Martha and not to
Mary, as we do, so often.
Hospitality,
love for neighbour, is a sacred commandment. Martha kept this commandment faithfully.
Still, there was something lacking. The
better part was chosen by Mary – “to be with him”. Mark tells us that the
apostles were called ‘to be with him and to be sent out’ (Mk3.13). While
apostolate, mission, and activities are important, the primacy is, “to be with
him”. Consecration and mission are two aspects of the same call.
Martha is like most of us, fully human - acting, feeling, saying, behaving as we do so often. She is a good housekeeper. She welcomes guests to her house, but she does not have too much time for them. She is warm and hospitable. She knows her position and duties in her house. She is practical and gets things done. She is also a woman with her share of jealousy and envy. She feels responsible for her sister and is distracted and disturbed seeing her having a good time. What is best in Martha is her warmth, hospitality, activism, direct talk, sincerity, talking it out there and then, taking the problem to the source where she can find an answer.
It is difficult for ‘Marthas’ to understand how ‘Marys’ have the ‘better part’. It is difficult to explain with quotes and arguments. Only experience and not explanation can teach one the joy of ‘ being with him’. Mary has discovered the answer to Martha’s question, “Do you not care?”
- Fr T.V.Georgesdb
